Holiday travel season is right around the corner, and if you have a baby or toddler and a plane ticket, I'm guessing you have a few nerves about it. Maybe a lot of nerves! Mama, take a breath. Flying with little ones can be a little bumpy, but it is so doable, and getting your baby to a table full of people who love them is worth a few hard hours in the air.
I organized this guide as a timeline, from the moment you start looking at flights to the moment you land, so you can tackle one piece at a time instead of carrying the whole trip around in your head. It pulls together what pediatric experts recommend and what the veteran moms I text swear by.
When You Book: Set Yourself Up to Win
Lap infant or their own seat?
On most U.S. domestic flights, children under 2 can ride on a parent's lap for free or close to it. With holiday fares what they are, that is really tempting. But the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that babies and toddlers fly in their own seat, buckled into an FAA-approved car seat or harness device, because turbulence can happen without warning and a parent's arms just aren't a safety restraint. You can read the full guidance on flying with your baby at HealthyChildren.org.
If a second seat isn't in the budget this year, you are not a bad mom. Plenty of families fly with a lap infant. Just go in knowing the tradeoff, and ask at the gate whether the flight has open seats. Some airlines will let you bring your car seat on board if the seat next to you ends up empty.
Pick flight times with your little one in mind
There's no perfect flight time, but there are better ones for your family. Some babies sleep beautifully on a flight that lines up with a nap. Others are so excited by everything that they won't close their eyes, and an early flight when everyone is fresh works better. Think about when your child is usually at their happiest and book around that. If you can swing it, I highly recommend paying a little extra for a nonstop. Every connection is another round of packing up, deplaning, and hunting for a changing table.
Seats that make life easier
- A window seat gives you more privacy for feeding and keeps curious hands away from the aisle and the drink cart.
- Car seats usually have to go by the window so they don't block anyone's path out of the row. Check your airline's rules before you choose seats.
- Bassinet seats are available on many long-haul and international flights for young babies. Call the airline early to request one, because they go fast.
A Few Weeks Out: Health and Paperwork
A quick check-in with your pediatrician before a big trip is never a bad idea, especially with a young baby. Many doctors suggest waiting until a newborn is at least a few weeks old before flying, and yours will have the best advice for your specific baby. It's also a great time to make sure everyone is up to date on vaccines, including the flu shot for anyone 6 months and older, since holiday airports are basically a germ convention. If you're heading abroad, the CDC's Travelers' Health site has destination-specific recommendations.
And if someone does come down with something right before or during the trip, my sick day survival guide walks through fevers, fluids, and when to call the doctor.
A few paperwork items to handle now so they aren't a scramble later:
- Proof of age. Airlines may ask for it for lap infants, so keep a copy of the birth certificate handy.
- Passports. Babies need their own for international travel, and processing can take a while.
- Your car seat label. Look for the sticker that says it is certified for use in motor vehicles and aircraft. Booster seats are not approved for use on planes.
Packing: Your Diaper Bag Is Mission Control
You do not need to pack the whole nursery, but your carry-on should be able to get you through a long delay without a meltdown (yours or theirs). Here's a list to start from:
- Diapers: plan on roughly one per hour of travel, plus a few extras for delays
- Wipes, a portable changing pad, and a handful of zip-top bags for messy clothes
- Two changes of clothes for baby and a spare shirt for you (trust me on this one)
- Bottles, formula, pumped milk, or nursing cover, whatever your feeding setup looks like
- More snacks than you think you could possibly need for toddlers
- A few small, new-to-them toys, stickers, or board books
- Pacifiers on a clip, plus a backup
- Any medications your child takes and the infant fever reducer your pediatrician recommends
- Layers, since planes swing from warm to chilly
Mama tip: Pack a small grab pouch with one diaper, a travel pack of wipes, a pacifier, and a snack, and keep it in your seat pocket. That way you aren't digging through the overhead bin every time someone needs something.
What helps at each age
| Age | What tends to help | What to plan for |
|---|---|---|
| 0 to 6 months | Feeding on takeoff and landing, a baby carrier through the airport, familiar sleep cues like a sleep sack or white noise | Frequent feeds and diaper changes; extra care around crowds and germs |
| 6 to 12 months | New small toys, easy finger foods, a slow walk up the aisle when the seatbelt sign is off | Stranger anxiety and a strong urge to crawl everywhere |
| 12 to 24 months | Snacks in little containers, stickers, a downloaded show if screens are part of your routine | Lots of wiggles and a short attention span; switch activities often |
| 2 years and up | Their own small backpack, a preview of what the day will look like, a special airplane activity | They need their own ticket now, and big feelings in long lines are normal |
At the Airport: Security, Strollers, and Boarding
Security with kids is mostly about being organized. Formula, breast milk, juice, and baby food are allowed in your carry-on in reasonable quantities, even over the usual liquid limit. Tell the TSA officer at the start that you have them, and pull them out of your bag so they can be screened separately. Ice packs for keeping milk cold are generally fine too.
Most airlines let you gate-check a stroller and car seat for free, which is a lifesaver in a big airport. A car seat travel bag helps protect it from scuffs, and a baby carrier keeps your hands free in the security line. If you plan to use the car seat on board, make sure you know how to buckle it in quickly with a lap belt. My car seat safety guide covers the basics of a good fit.
Boarding is a personal call. Some families love pre-boarding so they can set up without an audience. Others board last to cut down on time spent sitting still. If you have two adults, try both: one boards early with the gear, and the other boards last with the baby.
On the Plane: Ears, Sleep, and Your Own Nerves
Help those little ears
Pressure changes can make babies' ears uncomfortable. Sucking and swallowing help, so nursing, offering a bottle, or a pacifier during takeoff and especially descent can make a big difference. Descent is often harder than takeoff, so save a feed if you can. And if your baby falls asleep on takeoff? Let them sleep. Many babies do just fine.
Skip the sleepy medicine
You may hear well-meaning advice about giving an antihistamine to help a baby sleep on a flight. Pediatricians advise against using medications this way. They aren't safe for that purpose in young children, and they can even make some kids more wound up. Stick with your usual sleep cues and let the hum of the plane do some of the work.
If your baby cries
Here's the truth: your baby might cry. Babies cry on planes, and it doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong. Most of the people around you have been there or know someone who has. Focus on your child, not on the strangers, and remember the flight will end.
The flight is a few hours. You are a great mom for every one of them, even the loud ones.
Say yes to help
I'll be honest, I am terrible at accepting help. Ask anyone in my big family village! But this is one of those times to practice. If a flight attendant offers to hold your coffee or a seatmate offers to pull your bag down from the bin, say thank you and say yes. If you're traveling with your partner, divide and conquer: one person is on kid duty, one person is on gear duty, and you switch every so often so nobody hits empty.
When You Land: Give Everyone Grace
Expect the first day or two to be a little off. New places, new faces, and maybe a new time zone can throw routines out the window. Sleep training at our house felt all over the place even when we were home, so I don't expect perfection on the road, and you shouldn't expect it of yourself either. Get outside in daylight, keep bedtime cues familiar, and know that most little ones settle back in within a few days of getting home.
A few safety checks when you arrive at Grandma's or a rental:
- Safe sleep still matters. Bring or reserve a travel crib or play yard so your baby has a firm, flat, empty space to sleep.
- Do a quick sweep. Look for medications in purses and on nightstands, dangling cords, unsecured furniture, and open stairs. My baby-proofing checklist is a handy room-by-room guide.
- Hand off a few basics. Let the grandparents know about your child's sleep routine, allergies, and car seat rules if they'll be driving.
A Note From Jordan
I'm so grateful for my big, loud, wonderful family village, and I know so many of you are flying across the country this season to get to yours. The travel day is one day. It might be messy, and that's ok. The hugs waiting at the end of it are the whole point. Pack the extra shirt, say yes to help, and give yourself all the grace in the world.